A Special Diet

About two years ago, I discovered a have a gluten sensitivity. It triggers my migraines (I have many, many other migraine triggers, but gluten is the most severe and immediate) and so I avoid it as much as I can. We are not 100% gluten free at home, but I'm working on it.

These days it seems as if "gluten free" is the way to go whether you have a sensitivity to it/are celiac or not. I hesitate to tell people I don't eat gluten because I know it must seem as if I'm trying to be trendy. But a lot of people don't know that wheat, and the gluten contained in wheat, cause a host of issues for many of us. It's not just about gaining weight, either.

Did you know that wheat has only been in our diets for 7,000 years (source: Gluten Free Baking Classics by Annalise Roberts)? Humans, or homosapiens, have been on the earth for roughly 100,000 years but we didn't eat wheat for about 90,000 of those years. As Annalise points out, that's like a 45 year old man eating wheat for the first time at age 41. I like to spout that statistic when I hear people wonder why it seems as if gluten is causing issues for people "all of a sudden." In reality, these issues have developed over the course of many years, and what seems like an everyday problem (like IBS, indigestion, arthritis, depression, even acne) can often be attributed to a gluten sensitivity/intolerance or celiac disease. Celiac is the most misdiagnosed disease in the United States!

More telling is the fact that the wheat we grew 200 years ago is not the wheat we are growing today. In order to make the fluffiest cakes, muffins, and breads, we have genetically modified our wheat to contain as much as 50% more gluten than it used to.

Of course, the easiest way to avoid gluten is to just stop eating things that contain it. But it's so difficult to avoid gluten completely, and even harder if you love a good slice of pizza or have a serious sweet tooth. Plus, gluten seems to be in everything. Did you know that soy sauce and sausage casing have gluten in them? (I didn't.) It's a constant effort on my part and sometimes I "cheat." A cookie here, a pita there. Bagels and pizza (two of my favorite foods) trigger a migraine for me within an hour after I've eaten them--most likely because the gluten content in those is high. Crusty breads do the same.

It's important to remember that gluten free does not equal healthy. Processed food is processed food, whether it's gluten free, vegan, low fat, sugar free, whatever. And I don't like substitutions. I eat vegan for periods of time and I don't like fake cheese or textured vegetable protein that pretends to be meat. 

I often get asked if my kids are off gluten too, and for now, the answer is no. They are carbohydrate hounds, and I monitor their consumption as much as possible, because simple carbs = sugar, and well, we know how that goes with small kids (it's been over a year since I've bought those Goldfish crackers, and that was a big hurdle to overcome!).

The best solution I've found is to make as much of what we eat at home from scratch, which is always a priority to me whether it's gluten free or not. Baking is a science, and gluten free baking/cooking is even more so. You need a balance of grains and starches, but there are so many different flours it's easy to get confused and overwhelmed (and buying all those flours can get expensive!). I've found a few great resources and I'd love to share them with you. We are once again enjoying pancakes, waffles, bread, muffins, cookies, and cakes.

Gluten Free Baking Classics by Annalise Roberts -- Every single thing I've tried from this book is delicious and easy. Annalise has a few basic flour mixes which are simple and accessible. The first part of her book has some history on gluten (part of which I shared above) and explains the science behind gluten free baking and cooking, which is really invaluable. Her blog is also awesome.

These pancake and waffle recipes from Lynn's kitchen adventures are fantastic--fluffy, delicious, and not a hint of gluten.

Gluten Free Slow Cooking -- I love my slow cooker and I love gluten free. This has some delicious recipes.

Gluten Free Girl and The Chef -- A writer as well as a chef, Shauna's blog is a wonderful source for many amazing recipes and great information.

google -- Yep, google. I have found many intriguing and ultimately tasty recipes by just googling them.

Do you have a special diet?

Guest Post - Help Your Child: Prevent Diabetes With Exercise

Diabetes was never something that I personally worried about, and it wasn’t until my little cousin was going through testing for Type II Diabetes that I started to really pay attention to the disease, and to understand the serious consequences that come with it. Diabetes is a serious disease that affects millions of people each year including children. The only way to free our country of this disease is to raise awareness about it. November is American Diabetes Month, so it is more important than ever to promote knowledge of this illness.

Type II Diabetes used to be a disease that mainly affected adults, however it is now affecting children at an extremely high rate. In fact, nearly 200,000 people under the age of 20 have diabetes. Children are more likely to develop Type II Diabetes if they are overweight and inactive. Carrying excess weight increases the chance of insulin resistance, which is a main cause of diabetes. While there are factors that are uncontrollable when it comes to Type II Diabetes, obesity and lack of exercise are the two biggest controllable factors, which is why it’s so important to understand them and practice preventative habits.

The fact that so many children are developing Type II Diabetes is disheartening. They are still so young and have to deal with this terrible disease that can be life-threatening – many people don’t realize that the

longer a person has diabetes, the more risk they have of developing heart disease when they are older. This is why parents have to step up and do everything they can to prevent their children from developing

diabetes. In addition to encouraging healthy eating habits, parents should motivate their children to stay active. Exercising at least 30 minutes a day can greatly reduce your child’s risk of developing diabetes. There are many activities that will allow kids to get the aerobic exercise they need without it feeling like they are actually exercising.

Here are tips on how you can help your child stay active so that he can avoid obesity and diabetes.

Yoga: Calm-Inducing and Demanding Activity All in One

Yoga is not just for adults; children can also enjoy this relaxing exercise. Doing yoga exercises will not just keep your child fit, but it will also improve his mood, increase his flexibility and improve joint health.

Think about attending a parent-child yoga class at your local health club with your child. Once you two learn all the different yoga moves, you can do the exercises in your home – either through memory or by following along to yoga videos!

Hiking through Nature

Your child is more likely to enjoy exercise if you choose a physical activity they enjoy. For example, you can go on a nature hike with them the next time the weather is nice. During the nature hike, your child can burn calories and see all sorts of different trees, flowers and animals. They can also collect different rocks and leaves on the way and make a collage with them when you get back home!

Get Your Groove On!

A fun way to help your child stay fit is to have a dance competition in your living room. Encourage them to invite a few of their friends over and compete against one another. Each child has a certain amount of time to dance to upbeat music. Once they are all done, choose the one who danced the best, silliest, etc.

Thinking about your child developing diabetes can be scary, but encouraging them to exercise on a regular basis, along with a healthy, nutritional diet, can significantly reduce their risk of developing the disease. It is scary for me to think of my little cousin having diabetes, particularly because of all the consequences that come with the disease. Taking a preventative approach with her now will hopefully prevent the development of heart disease and other illnesses later on in her life. In my attempt to get her on the right track of a healthy lifestyle, as well as my other cousins, I have started to implement activity days each week in which we try some form of activity that keeps us moving – we did the dance party, took the nature hike, played paintball, organized a neighborhood-wide kickball game, and are going to continue this so it becomes a lifelong habit for all of them.

Carolyn is a 20-something year old with a passion for life, fitness and overall well being. She is an avid cycler, golfer and has known to bust some serious moves on the dance floor. Check out Carolyn’s blog at http://fullonfit.blogspot.com/

Unplug and Reboot

Like most people these days, I spend a good amount of time reading online. Blogs and online news articles have replaced books and magazines for me to a large extent. I follow a lot of blogs and pages on Facebook, and have some sites that I visit independently. I'm on my iPhone mostly when I'm nursing.

Lately, I feel like every article I read is either about a terrible tragedy, a child getting molested or otherwise abused, horrible and extremely rare accidents, which chemical is going to kill me and my family today, an “expert” telling me I’m parenting all wrong and alienating my husband and messing up my kids for life, or (and this is my least favorite), a judgmental, negative rant written by one mom criticizing the methods of another.

I often joke about being neurotic, but I definitely have anxiety with varying intensity based on what is going on in my life at any given moment. Little things like crumbs on the floor or forgotten tasks can become big and overwhelming. Because my anxiety directly relates to my feelings of depression, no matter how rare that is at this point, and because anxiety causes me to lose it way more than I like, I’m making every effort possible to reduce as much stress as I can in my day to day.

I realized that being exposed to the types of news and articles I outlined above, even though initially I may feel like I have learned something, or even if I feel there is some entertainment value, exacerbates my feelings of negativity and anxiety. Whereas someone who doesn’t have my personality traits may be able to brush bad news off (like my husband, for example), I become influenced by whatever I’m reading or seeing to the extent where it affects my mood, or worse, my general outlook. I’ve always been this way. When I was younger my sister would marvel at how much whatever I watched on TV influenced me, and I would stay transfixed on it for days.

I want to be inspired, and I feel like that’s so rare these days. The ultimate voyerist’s playground, the media allows us to see and read about things that were once private, or maybe just not reported. Everything has a yin and a yang, and though media, the internet and social networking obviously has many benefits, sometimes it just feels like too much information is out there. And stupidly, I’m reading ALL of it.

Every story about child abduction, abuse, etc., makes me think of my own kids and what I would do if something like that happened to one of them. Every freak accident I read about makes me fearful of trying that food/going on that excursion/playing that extreme sport. I can guarantee I am  killing my whole family bit by bit, as I am sure that despite my best efforts, I haven’t gotten rid of all chemicals in my household (we microwave in plastic! Egads!). Every check in on Facebook ensures at least two or three articles on a page I have “liked” telling me what parenting mistakes I’m currently making. And then there are those judgmental articles written by moms, which have made me completely paranoid whenever I do absolutely anything in public with my kids, as I am sure someone somewhere is judging me (whether they are or they’re not, I just don’t want to know about it. Ignorance is bliss, at least in this case).  When this happens several times a day, every day, it’s overwhelming. Meanwhile, my life is passing me by.

The thing is, I just want to be happy. I feel like I am finally ready to let go of my anger, which is a huge step in the right direction, and something I’ve never been able to say before. If it makes me more vulnerable, well, so be it. I have to trust that my friends and family love me and won’t hurt me. I’m tired of being in control all the time. I’m ready to let go. I don’t want to yell at my kids anymore. I don’t want to be mad at my husband anymore. I don’t want to have enemies anymore. I don’t want to think about the past anymore. It’s such a relief. It feels like I can finally breathe.

So. Here’s where this all ties in for me. I need to unplug. And then reboot.

I will spend less time online. I will unplug from negativity. I’ve already unsubscribed from various sites that post nothing but dribble and don’t contribute to my well-being and happiness. One popular site I used to visit often is gone from my bookmarks (they were the worst offenders in terms of reporting absolutely horrible news I otherwise would never come across). I’m not sticking my head in the sand, just not letting sand get thrown in my eyes.

I will cherish my friendships and my loving, amazing family. I’m so lucky to be able to say that I have friends for life, and my family is the center of my universe. I will nurture and cultivate those relationships because I value and appreciate them. I will avoid negativity in those relationships as well.

I will drink in every moment I can with my children—even thechallenging ones. I’m going to stop washing the dishes and look at my son in the eye when he tells me a story. I’m going to hug my daughter gently when she has a potty accident. I’m going to hold my infant close and kiss her when sh ecries. I’m going to hug them and kiss them every day until they are sick of me.

When in doubt, we will dance. Lately, when things are getting a little too serious, I put on music and we have a dance party. It makes everyone happy and no one remembers what the fuss was about.

I will take lots of deep breaths. Recently, in situationswhere I’m about to lose it, I stop, close my eyes, and take a deep breath in and out. Just those three seconds allow me to calm down enough so that I don’t yell/grab/freak/have other insane reaction to a ridiculously silly issue. In that breath, I remind myself that it’s ok to let go—it’s ok to not get mad. I still lose it at times. But it’s getting so much better.

I will count my blessings. I’m probably the last person on the blogosphere to do so, but I’ve recently discovered the lovely and extraordinary Stephanie Nielson, and watching her count her blessings has inspired me to do the same, probably for life.

I will have gratitude. This is totally not my idea, but I love it. Each day I will take the time to write down what I am grateful for. I imagine the list will get long very quickly.

I will pray. I am more spiritual than religious, per se, but my faith is strong and I need to lean on it more. Every time I pray I feel better afterwards.

I will look into my husband’s eyes every day. After all, he is the reason for all of this. He has helped make me who I am. He and I have created this family.

I will try to find something lovely and precious in every single day. Even the worst days are filled with miracles.

This isn’t a new me. It’s a better, upgraded version. I’m sure there will be bugs to fix, but I know that it will be a much smoother running program. A reboot.

5 Things Moms Want In a Doctor

Most doctors and pediatricians get into the profession because they want to help people. Most pre-med students and doctors I've talked to always say that they got interested in medicine because they want to make people feel better, they had a positive medical experience or a negative one (either themselves or through a relative) and they want either emulate that experience or make it better for others, or they love science and want to make life better for others. I've never heard anyone say that they want to go into medicine because they want to intimidate people, de-humanize people, ignore people, or condemn people for decisions that they've researched more thoroughly than they have. And yet, I've known many moms who have mentioned these three exact reasons for why they are switching doctors either for themselves or their children. I've even read about moms who purposefully lie or refuse to discuss things with their doctors for fear of being disrespected, disregarded, and disparaged. I'm sure that there are no doctors out there who would say that what they want patients to do is lie to them. So, where's the disconnect coming from?

I think that most doctors, even the ones who the moms are complaining about, probably do want to help people, they just aren't aware of what they are doing that isn't helping. So, I talked to some moms through the connected mom facebook page and some of the moms I know in real life, and I decided to compile a list to let doctors and pediatricians know what it is that parents really want in a doctor. These are the keys to getting parents to stay with your practice and developing honest, long term, and open communication with your patients.

1. Be honest yourself.
Be honest not just about what you know, but also about the scope of your knowlege and what you don't know. Don't be afraid to say when you don't know something or you haven't done much research about something. This sounds like one that would be easy, but when you are in a position of authority, you might have the urge to pretend you know more than you do. Don't. That was one of the biggest red flags moms complained about with doctors. Parents care about your credentials and that you are knowledgeable, but they care more about your honesty. My son had to go in for cranial surgery when he was ten months old because of a dermoid cyst located between his growth plates in his skull. The first two doctors I saw in our family practice were very honest with me that they thought it was probably a harmless cyst, but they honestly didn't know what kind of cyst could be so rigid and if that cyst was dangerous. They then gave me the option of pursuing more tests and seeing specialists. Their honesty helped me to get an accurate diagnosis for my son and he ended up with a surgery. It turns out that had the doctors bluffed me into false security, my son likely would have ended up with brain damage because we were (literally) micrometers away from neural damage. I did not choose new family doctors and I did not lose confidence in them because of their honesty. Instead, their lack of knowledge became an integral part of my decision making and likely saved my son from permanent consequences.

2. Treat every patient (no matter how small) as important
One of the most beautiful responses to my question of "What do you look for in a pediatrican or a doctor?" came from a mom on the facebook page. She wrote: "At my son's first pediatrician appointment, she took him in her arms,looked directly in his eyes and said "Welcome to the world, I am so very glad to meet you!" Another mom wrote, "I also look for a pediatrician (or family doctor) that actually talks to us, especially our daughter, rather than asking question after question. You get a lot more by talking to a child about their lives than asking pointed questions at their parents." Moms were clear that they didn't care how long they had to wait for an appointment as long as they felt they and their child were well cared for during their own appointments. Little differences, like making eye contact, asking before you touch them or their child, talking about the child's health rather than just running down the checklist of questions, made all the difference in whether or a parent would continue taking their child to you. As yet another mom put it, "If a doctor acts like they're too busy for me, it's always my last appointment with them."

3. Be respectful.
Parents look to you to provide accurate, educated health information and recommendations to parents so that they can make good decisions for themselves and their children. Because they are in the position to make the ultimate decisions, remember to respect their questions and their opinions, even if they are different from your own. One mom wrote about her annoyance with her doctor's fixation on her child's place on the low end of the growth chart. She and her husband are both small themselves and were also small as children. While it is her doctor's job to point out that her child falls outside the norm on the growth chart, the mom knows that her child eats well and is healthy. She gets frustrated that the doctor seems to "judge" her for not wanting to take action.

Likewise, there may be times when you disagree with a parent's choice such as when a parent chooses not to vaccinate, but you must respect that even though they have made a choice that you may not approve of even after you have given them all the information you feel is important. The decision is ultimately their's and not yours. Most moms seem to be fine with you giving an opinion contrary to their own as long as you show them respect for theirs. As another mom put it, "The most important thing for me is getting a sense of mutual respect. I don't feel like I need a pediatrician who agrees with all my parenting choices, but I do need someone who respects them and whose opinion I can respect. I want someone who will work with me and who is alright with me being informed and engaged, not someone who will do whatever because he says so."

4.Don't overstep your bounds.
Be clear between your research and your opinion. If a parent asks your opinion, of course you should give it, but make a clear delineation between what you know from personal experience and research and what you just think. Offer it as a piece of advice not "doctor's orders." For example, if a tired parent comes in and asks about sleep pattern normalcy, tell them what you have researched as in the normal range for that age because that is the medical, physical answer, but don't offer opinions on what that parent should or shouldn't be doing. You are offering medical information, but parenting decisions are up to each parent. You may never choose to bedshare, breastfeed, or cloth diaper, and you may believe that tantrums should be ignored or that infants shouldn't be held too often, but these are all highly personal parenting decisions that should be made by the person with the most experience with each individual child. While you may have seen that child every month for about twenty minutes to an hour since he or she was born, that parent has been with them all that time plus the other 23 hours a day. As one mom put it, "I really don't like it when doctors give you parenting advice, such as what to do about a temper tantrum, how to get your child to not throw things on the floor, sleep training, etc. I feel they are not trained in it and don't have any authority in that area[.]"

5. Don't forget how important everything you do can be.
What may be a routine diagnosis or procedure for you, may be intensely scary or life changing for a parent or a child. Make sure to show your compassion for people alongside your passion for medicine. Make sure that you soothe nerves and worries as well as you heal wounds. I remember that the second my son went limp from the anesthesia for his operation, my child was taken from me and I was told to "quickly give him a kiss and walk away." When it took me more than three seconds to respond and disappear, I was given the order more sternly. I understand that they were in a hurry to intubate him and that they were focused on my son's surgical needs and the task at hand, but they clearly didn't realize that my whole life was on that table and that I needed a few seconds to process that. I needed someone to actually look me in the eye and say, "We'll take care of your baby."

Thanks for reading and I hope this has reached a well meaning doctor somewhere!

Shawna