Thursday, October 18, 2012

Plans

Today is the last day of my thirties. How did I get here so fast? Wasn't I just trying to figure out the roller coaster of a 17-year-old life yesterday?

(Now I understand how my parents feel. My mom will tell she just got back from her honeymoon and now her fifth child, her baby, is forty. It's not possible. I have no doubt someday I will feel exactly the same about the Agents.)

I'm certain my life so far is not what I imagined, but . . .

Does anyone really end up where they expect? (And if we did, how uninspiring would that be?)

I never dreamed I'd be capable of leading the stay-on-your-toes life of a military spouse (because, frankly, I'm kind of neurotic) and yet here I am.

I have been pregnant, breastfeeding, or both for over seven years now. My last baby will turn two in a few weeks. In the not-to-distant future there will be no more nursing, no more co-sleeping, no more diapers. As a family, we will enter a new season.

(Sometimes I can't even wrap my own brain around the fact that I'm forty and I have a two-year-old. Does that make me an "older mom"? Would other people see me that way?)

When I studied developmental and social psychology as a college student, I intended to have a career researching it, teaching it, writing about it. Instead, I'm living it.

When I first started working, I couldn't fathom being a stay-at-home-momBreastfeeding toddlersHomeschooling?

None of that was on the agenda. 

And you know what?

I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. Are you?

Thanks for reading and have a blessed day.



3 comments:

Adrienne said... [Reply to comment]

Sigh. I'm about a decade behind you, but I feel exactly the same way. Love your ending, "When I first started working, I couldn't fathom being a stay-at-home-mom. Breastfeeding toddlers? Homeschooling?" and agree 100%. Totally unexpected but absolutely wonderful in every way. Thank you for sharing and blessings on your journey!

Tricia said... [Reply to comment]

I definitely know that feeling - I'm also not where I thought I'd be but I wouldn't want to be anyplace else. Lovely post!

Kaley said... [Reply to comment]

You have a very beautiful family. I have been married to a navy for almost 2 years now but it's just now that we're having our honeymoon safari. Never would I have thought that I'd become a military spouse yet here I am. Thanks!

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